In the blink of an eye
by xx beccarella xx
Summary: Renesmee and Bella's dead.Edward,a doctor, just wants justice for his wife and child's death. But who exactly murdered them...and is DR Edward Cullen as sane as he believes he is? All told in EPOV Rated M for future chapters. Please R&R thanks
1. introductions

****DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN STEPHANIE MYERS CHARACTERS****

HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY THIS STORY AND REVIEWS ARE ALWAYS WELCOME!

Preface

I, my wife and children were the victims of a brutal and vicious arson attack, all because I put thee king of all drug dealers in jail. The drug pushers (as they are sometimes referred to on the street) are not normal drug dealers who are trying to make some money oh no- they were running a multi-million dollar company which had hundreds of customers and they would stop at nothing to get exactly what they want. The so called_ customers _were furious and started to rebel, causing me and my family months upon months of cruel torture. It was a big break for me because I cracked the case of a lifetime and which hundreds of people were investigating greatly. However, it would be extremely awful for the drug pushers and their customers. If it wasn't for the neighbours next door to us, who called 911, then none of my family would be here today. I am eternally grateful to them and know that I cannot repay their debt, not even in my lifetime.

Because I had put those criminals in jail, I became a _hero_ cop which unsettled me greatly. I mean, you hear all of the time on the T.V. that police officers are killed because they have cracked a big case. You always think that it will never happen to you and it does.

What they don't show, and probably should show is all of the paperwork and other colleagues that have helped out. For this case there were most of the field officers and newly-recruited officers. If it wasn't for them, then the drug dealers would still be the out there; terrorising and killing many more of their customers.

The thing was, most drug dealers don't offer the full amount of the drug; it could be 28% cocaine and the other 72% rat poison. Even if cocaine was legal, then there would be just as many people dying. I as a police officer feel as though it is my duty to protect as many people as possible from harm; whatever the costs.

The government had an important discussion about me and my family's welfare and, took it into their own hands that I should be the newest entry in the witness relocation programme because they didn't want to risk it. It could have been a bizarre and unreal coincidence which you always hear about. I very much doubt that though unreal as it may seem.

But you see, things have just from bad to worse in the year after the incident. I was again, a victim of a hit and run but not with cars as many people are lead to believe -Oh no- it was people who were trained for this kind of thing. Thugs. At first I thought it was the criminals who I had locked away but when I had phoned the police station they were still in prison. And then I thought it was the customers but that was even harder to prove. I knew from past experience that most criminals have a lot of contacts and connections. Even now I know it was them and without anyone knowing except my wife, I am still working on the case.

So we got relocated to New Jersey. I had just had a terrible three hour car journey and on top of a four hour flight, which seemed to take ages. Its funny you know- events that are boring seem to drag on.

It would have been a perfect opportunity for them to attack us in public because there was less chance of anyone noticing our disappearance. It was easily enough time for them to attack not only me, but my family also, and get their revenge.

I mustn't think like that- God will protect us from harm. God has given us a chance for us to have a fresh start at life. The only bad thing about my new life is that I'm not allowed to be a police officer anymore; which was the worst thing possible for me.

Luckily I had found a job with some action… a doctor, I did have the GCSE's for it and my father was a doctor, so I thought it might be a good opportunity to try new things along with my new lifestyle. But my new life soon turned into a nightmare.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1- new beginnings**

**It was 75 degrees in the charming state of New Jersey. I, my wife and three kids were moving house from the sunny state of California. I loved California more than any other place in the world, even more than what theme parks mean to children.**** There were so many places that I wished I had taken the girls' to like Disneyland and the Hard Rock Café. ****It was the only place I felt safe until one terrible night. The thing in which I was shocked most about was the fact about what happened last week; I mean I had never experienced anything like that before, not even when I was doing field work. I am just a regular person like you or me; lots of friends and family close by and an active lifestyle.**

**I don't like many sports but the ones which I d****o like can entertain me for hours. Baseball is my passion; I watch every game that the G****iants are playing and although the girls don't like it; ****I try to go to the games as often as possible. Even though I am now going to live in California; I will still certainly try my best to go and see every game possible. Even if t****hat involves watching it off Emmett's 50 inch plasma television**** then I will do so.**

**When I told my closest friends about my move they were really surprised, they never thought that I would be leaving because I am such an overjoyed and almost hyper character, who loves to socialise, but also who liked to keep things the way they were.**** I didn't think that they were that close to me because they don't show any emotion to anyone except Emmett**** Whene****ver anyone leaves from our work we have to do something unusual and the more different; the better the reward. Last year when Emmett's cousin left to go back to his home town in Washington, he decided to go swimming with sharks for the day. He almost died o****f a panic attack so everyone decided that we were not allowed to do anything **_**that **_**dangerous. I decided, with lots of help from Emmett, to ****go bungee jumping blindfolded. I wouldn't call myself an adrenalin junkie but I do like exuberating things.**

**Most of them, especially Emmett,**** think I'm crazy and that I'm**** missing out on all of that sunshine,**** but I have to think of my family's protection first. **

**The truth of the matter is we had no other choice. If it was down to me and no one else, then I would have spent the rest of my life there. **

"**How many more of the boxes are left sweetheart?" I asked, in as calm of a tone that was possible considering the current situation.**

"**Just a few dad, do you want me to bring them inside?" my only daughter****, Reneesmee , said, shouting as if I was 100 meters away and not 100 feet.**

"**Well do you think that I would ask that if I didn't want them inside?" I said very sarcastically****, which was unusual and nothing like me. Knowing and my daughter realising this, I quickly tried to clam down and not to hurt Reneesme's**** feelings "Sorry darling I didn't mean to shout at you like that its just it is emotional for me you know, me and your mum had spent fourteen years in the **_**old **_**house and now we live in this one, having to make new friends and a n****ew life."**

"**Its okay dad I understand…I have to make new friends too." she had said in a very reassuring ****and calming tone, but the guilt rushed through me at the thought that my kids would have to start fresh too. I think ****it's**** probably harder for them because they ****don't know what happened with the fire and why we have had to**** move.**

**They think it is just a fire started by a cigarette.**** (I know you are probably thinking that I am a horrible father but I had no other choice; I didn't want them living in fear th****e rest of their lives.) On top of all of that, they have to be classed as the **_**new kids **_**at school which will make them outcasts and they will probably have a hard time coping with the emotional side of everything.**

"**I'll come and see how many ****boxes there are ****just to be sure."**** Somehow I felt as though I had spoken that immensely slowly and attempting to distract myself from my previous thoughts (and unsuccessfully.) I am the sort of person who loves to keep my thoughts to myself and keep everything bottled up.**

**I approached the glistening vivid red Volvo car and by this time Reneesme had gone into the house. I noticed that one of the boxes was open so I gently closed it. Still peeking out of it was the photograph of all of us at the last family party. My whole family was there, and what was more special, was that we were all dressed smart and the fact that we had never seen each other since my other child Carrie had died premature. I had blown the original photograph up to hang it in the living room, but the arson attack made it impossible to keep. A lot of things were destroyed that day because of the arson attack so, what few possessions we had left were the second most precious things. First were my family of course. Reneesme wore a beautiful ruby red dresses that seemed to sway with every step that she took and complemented her skin tone. ****The dress had subtle, but noticeable diamante's that made the dress glisten whatever the lighting was like. ****She looked so cute, but grow up at the same time****' if that is even possible****. I wore an olive green shirt with a black blazer and dark grey jeans. I looked smart but casual at the same time,**** which was nice for me because I didn't want to b****e in anything uncomfortable. **

**My wife was wearing the same blue cocktail dress that I proposed to ****her in; she still looks as beautiful as ever. She hasn't even aged a bit ****and that was 11 years ago. Me on the other hand, had aged significantly fast and look older than my years. **

**The night I proposed to her was the most magical night that I have ever encountered. We had been dating for three years ****prior to the engagement and we didn't do anything flashy that night because I had recently lost my job. I took ****her to the pictures to see **_**Friday the Thirteenth, **_**(not the new one but the old one.) It was remarkably good and after the pictures I took her to my place for a special, homemade meal which I had prepared. I was cringing incase she didn't like the meal but ****she loved it! After the dinner I made her cocktails whilst she was dancing to some **_**George Michael **_**on the radio. I had put the ring on the cocktail glass and nervously waited for her reaction. Luckily she had said yes and we were overwhelmed. **

**Finding it hard to put the photograph down, I examined it further. I noticed that my mother, Esme, was dressed very casually, but enhanced the outfit up tremendously with lots of accessories. She had impeccable taste for a seventy one year old. She used to love the kids like they were her own flesh and blood and not only half grandchildren. You see I was adopted because my birth mother, Elizabeth, had died. Luckily my new mother took me in and made me feel so welcome. What was magical about it was the fact that she looked after me, as though I was her real son and not an adopted son. Unfortunately, we had fallen out that day at the party over the amount of alcohol I had.**** I don't exactly have a drinking problem but I do like to drink. She always didn't like people who drink****, even since I was a little boy. Even people who had a thimble full annoyed her. What she hated more than anything was for any of her family to drink. She then died a week later, and I wish we never ended it on a bad note. W****hat's more****, is the fact that I never saw her before she died. More than anything else in the world I wished that I was there because I wanted to apologize to her. The instant I found out I had rushed to the hospital to pick up her belongings and of course see her for one last time. Apparently, she had been dying for weeks but I was unaware of that. Everyone was just as clueless as me. I thought that she still at least had a few years left in her because she was always full of life. The more I think of it now, the more I realise why she did that- incase anyone knew that she was ill and to make the last moments of her life worthwhile and as happy as they could be. I burst spontaneously into tears and I regrettably never had a chance to say goodbye to her, and just the thought makes me weep even more.**

**Trying to forget about the terrific year that I and my family have had, I staggered whilst carrying the boxes into the house. I began to carry the boxes one by one and it was quicker than I expected to unload it. As soon as I had finished unloading the boxes, I slammed the Volvo boot shut and the wind blew with an incredible force. I felt eerie, sick and angry. I always get angry at the wind because it always seems to hiss and whisper in my ear the final words in which my mother**** said whilst arguing with me. She said "I never want to see you again, not now, not ever and I especially don't want to see your family because they will remind me of you." **

**It was unforgettable and unnecessary for her to say that because it was not my ****families'**** fault - it was mine. I not only ruined my chan****ce of saying goodbye but I ruined the chance of my child and wife to say goodbye also. When I went to the hospital I didn't want them to see her and I regrettably think that I shouldn't have done that now.**

**Reneesme echoed in a really sweet voice that seemed to calm the wind down, and thankfully, she eased my temper aswell. ****"Dad**** I am really hungry****"**** she had said innocently, giving me her puppy dog eyes whenever she wanted something. Deliberately ignoring the fact that her puppy dog eyes were beginning to work on me, I gave in, but for a completely different reason. **

"**I know darling you barely tou****ched your food on the plane****….ill go to **_**McDonalds **_**and get something to eat for all of us****." As soon as I had finished saying that****, I took a deep sigh and looked at my feet. I was mentally and physically exhausted, but what was worse was the eerie wind that returned again, whispering the same thing but more violently this time. **

**I unlocked the door and got into the car. I tightened my fist into a ball and relaxed it. Putting my hands onto the steering wheel, I started the car. As soon as the engine roared, the many key rings on my car key clattered. I was trying to get the radio working but with no luck so I simply sang to myself to keep me sane and preoccupied. I was singing **_**Bullet for my Valentine's Tears Don't Fall **_**because it helped calm my anger down a lot.**

**I kept singing that song repeatedly for some reason,**** and I didn'****t know why I was singing it but it felt good. An half an hour drive seemed to take twice as long this time because of the amount of travelling I had done today.**** I was sure that I had done enough driving today but, if I didn't go then they would be hungry and my Bella would tell me off.**** I arrived about noon at the **_**McDonalds**_** restaurant. **

**I was amazed at the queue at **_**McDonald's**_** because I wasn't expecting it to be that big, I mean come on, it's just one out of the hundred ****fast food restaurants here in this area alone. I tried to exit and go somewhere else but, a silver **_**Vauxhall Tigra **_**appeared behind me when I was trying to reverse, so I was stuck in the queue. The horn from the car seemed to dazzle me. It sounded more like a cat being strangled than a car horn. **

**When it was finally my turn, I began to order. The person who served me was incredibly thin. He had bright ginger hair and a husky voice, which got deeper and huskier with every word that he spoke. He reminded me of the clown that is the character for **_**McDonalds**_** but he seemed a lot scarier. As usual I ordered lots of chicken nuggets and hundreds of chips. I fig****ured that that was enough for them seen as I wasn't hungry.**** Once the guy told me to wait at bay two, I began to study the ****décor inside****, seeing as I had nothing better to do. The **_**McDonald's**___**here was nothing like the one at California; this one was much more childlike and colourful and it took me by shock. I realised that it is for kids, but they tend to just have one corner for the children but not nearly the whole place. **

**I began to admire the one corner that was dedicated to adults- it was very sophisticated and luxurious, with**** caramel coloured décor and royal gold lampshades.**** The lampshades were like nothing I had ever seen, they were very tasteful and like royalty. I must have stared at the lightshades for a good ten minutes because the guy appeared with the rest of my order and was impatiently tapping at my window. I realised that he was doing his job but he was almost scratching it. He appeared without any warning and startled me. The guy began to giggle at my reaction and I gradually pulled down the car window to get my food. I drove off in embarrassment, almost in an instant. **

**Finally I was on my way home. The journey on the way home seemed to be at least an hour minimum, but in actually fact it was only half of that. I had not worked out how to work the radio again ****so I couldn't listen to any music (****I figured that ****that's probably**** why it felt like ages.) When I had arrived home some of the furniture like the beds, the TV and a few bits and bobs were unpacked. I was really surprised by how much they had done. It amazed me at how much it began to feel like home. ****The décor was old-fashioned and it was like an old couple had lived there. ****There was nothing familiar about the wallpaper- it was certainly not to our taste, but it did seem familiar- the colours**** and patterns reminded me of my mother's old house when I ****was younger. It was probably the furniture that enhanced the wallpaper making it feel like home.**

**I noticed that the all four beds, varying in size, were pushed along the main wall of the living room which had the same wallpaper as the rest of the house. I was amazed that the wallpaper was the same in every room; it was quite humorous really because I figured that the couple living here before had bought way too much wallpaper for the living room so they used it rather than binning it. I had assumed that we would just sleep on the floor or something, like what anyone does when they move house, but this was much better and I preferred this any day to sleeping on the damp carpeted floor.**

**We sat down on our beds and began munching our food.**** I still didn't have much of an appetite so I just watched them. Everyone enjoyed the food because they were "mmmm-ing" ****at it with every bite. But the way they were going on about it looked as if they had never been fed in days.**

**The menacing sounding doorbell passed through my body and surprised me. We were not expecting anyone so I wondered who it could have been but I figured that it would be the neighbour coming to greet us and see what we are like. It always bothered me when they look at you and try to figure out how much disturbance they would get. **

**Barbra told me to answer the door because she didn't want to be interrupted with her food. Standing there was a little old, shrivelled woman with a tray of food. I slowly but firmly opened the door, making sure that she had no reason to dislike us. "Hello can I help you?" I said already knowing who it was but simply said it to be nice and to look like the perfect and polite neighbour. **

"**Yes hello, I am June from next door, I have come to meet you and your lovely family and get better acquainted" she said with a grinning and evil smile. ****She looked innocent enough so I let the evil smile pass me. **

**Trying to not seem rude, I spoke to her "please do come in." As soon as she took a step inside, se began to stare at the décor and Barbra and the kids. For some reason she looked gingerly at them and I was puzzled; was it this house that made her anxious or is she normally like this. Realising that I was thinking only negative th****oughts, I offered her a seat on the bed and a cup of tea. **

**Trying to be polite, Bella pulled away from her beloved food, wiped her mouth and hands discretely on her top, and greeted her. It looked as though it was gourmet food and that they wanted me to give compliments to the chef, the way they approved of it. We began talking about absolutely anything. It felt good to laugh and joke with them, but it was also a funny sight to see that their entire faces were covered in ketchup and barbecue sauce. (A/N Hee hee.) Shortly after the neighbour had noticed the sauce all around their faces, she left.**

**It was relaxing after they had finished and after she had left because we talked for hours. We liked to develop our communication skills and to make sure that we have no secrets from each other. We discussed about how we would do each room. We had decided to let each of us personalise a room apart from our bedroom to make it appear even more like home. It was a nice idea because the house would be similar but different than our old home (****if that's even possible****.)**

**The conversation seemed to change my mood so that I was not thinking about the thugs for longer than usual. Then it had hit me. Everything was too perfect, or at least it seemed that way; the new house, escaping the airport and having fun, so I began to panic**** (I always panic, even if it's unnecessary.) ****Because we never had heard of the thugs for just over half a year now, then I knew that we would be hearing from them sooner rather than later. Thugs are not the sort of people to mess with- they always seek revenge no matter if they get caught. Aswell they never let you rest and they try their best to make you life in fear. (They are almost succeeding with me and Barbra worrying every minute.)**

**We had an early night that night, but I was still awake. I thought that would be best seeing as we had had a long day of travelling. I lay in my bed, which was closest to the door, and the smallest, hoping that they would not come but at the same time I was still waiting incase they thought about coming around tonight. I was right.**

**The door made a gentle squeak, at about dawn, and one man entered with completely blackened skin and clothes. My glass of water began to sizzle for no apparent reason, but I just ignored it. At first I thought the people were just robbers who had heard that we were moving in, and wanted to take some of our possessions. I would have preferred that any day than trying to deal with the same thugs which I was petrified of. I knew that it was defiantly one of the thugs. It was one of my hunches which were very accurate. We were completely unprotected and cut away from civilisation- the nearest sign of people was at least half an hour away. Immediately without thinking, I began to glare around the room, at the boxes, trying**** to locate the one that said "kitchen," so that I could find a knife as some sort of defence.**** No such luck, if they had sorted the boxes out, then they would have put the kitchen boxes in the kitchen. I tried to hunt for some sort of weapon to defend us which was near me. (At least there was some luck on my side.)**** Near my drink of water was a golf club. I didn't have the strength to reach it****, so I decided to build the strength up discretely**** with a drink. That didn't work.**

**I wanted to move and scream to my ****family that someone was here in the house but I couldn't****.**** I couldn't even open my mouth to attempt it****. I tried as hard as I could but no such luck, so I then tried to get up. Again no luck. I had been awake for thirty nine hours straight, so that was another factor that added to my lack of strength and unco-ordination. ****I couldn't even pick up th****e golf club or even move my arm to reach it.**

**The thug sat down on the nearby windowsill, just watching me making a desperate attempt and failing at it. My head started spinning and I felt really sick. It was a very peculiar feeling. The thug burst out with a quiet laughter at my desperate attempts. I forced my eyes open with all of my strength; they only opened a little bit though; at least it was enough to see what was happening. Nothing-yet.**

**I must have fallen asleep after that because I heard Bella yell a high pitched scream that woke me up. My eyes shot open. I saw my Bella being brutally carried out of the door. I had no inner strength to get up. It almost felt as though I was paralysed. In dire situations I get a sense of paralysis which is uncontrollable, which is quite ironic for a Doctor who is always on the move. ****I then thought that I wasn't actually tired. ****The sense of paralysis made me have numerous thoughts, but I came to the conclusion that I was drugged. I felt helpless; I could hear my family telling me to wake up and help them before they were carried out of the house, but it was no use.**

**The thugs had known how to get to me, in more ways than one. They had taken the best things in my life and I knew exactly what they wanted to gain from this- revenge and probably drugs. How could some people do this for drugs? It is unbearable to even think of. Drugs are only powdered prescription; they are a thing that helps you get better and not worse. Again I felt helpless. The only thing I could do was sleep, or at least lay there with my thoughts taking over me. **

**Later, about six am, I woke up with a frightening nightmare. The dream seemed so real but it was impossible to be. At least that was what I thought; I looked around anxiously and noticed that no-one was there. Almost without thinking, I**** jumped up and didn't know what to do.**** I panicked. There was a DVD and a note on my bed. The note said:**

_**Dear Edward,**_

_**You may not know who I am, but I certainly know who you are. I have watched you for years try to save as many people as possible even though it is no use. This DVD contains special messages from your family and I hope you sincerely enjoy it.**_

_**Love Aro.**_

**Without thinking, I immediately played the DVD. There was also a drink in a silver flask there, and I wondered why it was there, but then I realised that the DVD would tell me what everything was about.**

**There my family were. Sitting in the middle; blindfolded an****d confused, they began screaming my name incase I was there with them but they began to realise that I wasn't. ****They were terrified. A million different questions began to run through my mind like **_**how do you know where I live?**_** And **_**did you come back here whilst I was asleep to plant the note and the DVD?**_** I knew one of the answers immediately as soon as I thought of the questions. They had came back, I mean how else would they have video taped them suffering. I saw them get murdered. It was the most helpless and unimaginable thing that I had to ever witness, (and I had witnessed some unimaginable things in my life.) I began to sob. **

**I had always kept my personal life and my work separate****- it's the first thing they teach you in the police academy,**** so that the two paths would never cross, but I should have known that, that would have been impossible.**

**I never drank the water. I knew that they would have drugged it and took me away to the same death as that of my families. Although I was furious beyond belief, I had realised that if I was to die, then the thugs would never get the justice they deserve. **


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 –investigation

I had not eaten for the rest of that week. I thought about taking the DVD and the tape to the police but I didn't have the courage to do so. I also thought about binning them or using them as blackmail but then I would go in prison for several accusations. The DVD and the note were officially pieces of evidence and I wasn't allowed to touch or change them to make the thugs seem worse. I think that now I finally have enough evidence to prove that it was the thugs who had beaten me up, killed my family and set fire to my whole house. I was unaware that I had just made everything worse. I decided that I can no longer live in that house- well not for now anyway, so I was going to return to California to show the police the evidence and the thugs to finally get the fate they so rightfully deserve.

I never took any clothes or money with me on the plane because that would waste time looking for them and finally packing them. It was stupid. When I had arrived at New Jersey airport, I decided to just go on the closest available flight to California. It was just as well I had pre booked it otherwise I would have been stuck here for a few days. I fell asleep for the whole plane journey. Once I heard the plane land I woke up and stood up but the person next to me was asleep so I gently moved her out of the way and stepped over her.

Standing in the middle of my office was Emmett, my current best friend. Even though we were states apart I still kept in touch as often as I could and he was seriously thinking to move in with me. We knew the ins and outs of each other which was great but sometimes it was seriously spooky.

"Oh hi Edward, what can I do you for, how's your wife?" a fellow police officer had said enthusiastically with a cheerful smile on his face. As soon as he saw my emotionless expression, he frowned.

"Seriously what's wrong?" he said worriedly and I burst into tears. I never burst into tears so he knew something was wrong.

As he looked at me again worriedly, I began to answer his question stuttering at the words. "cc…an I ggg…o into yyy…our office…cceee?" I began to blubber again.

"Of course you can come on in" he said less enthusiastically this time.

As I began to explain what had happened, his mug with a full cup of coffee smashed on the floor. The cup was how I felt – smashed inside.

He immediately offered support but it was not what I wanted, not what I _needed. _What I needed was to see those thugs behind bars and getting the punishment in which they deserve. Several minutes had passed and I finally was not stuttering my words. As soon as I had plucked up the courage, I played the tape. I couldn't watch it again so I left him to watch. I instructed him to pay a close watch on any parts where the thugs might speak. I should have warned him. I could see the look of horror on his face, but at the same time he was fixated on it, which I didn't know was good or bad. Sitting outside Emmett's office near my old desk, I tried to distract myself so that the thoughts couldn't run away with me, but it didn't work aswell as what I had hoped. The distant echo in my ear finally distracted me. It was the radio calling for backup. I felt like I was a police officer again but I wasn't. I was a doctor now and I had to accept it. Still curious about the tape I listened in, hoping for a distraction. As soon as the radio had finished calling for backup, every police officer except Emmett left.

Eventually when Emmett had finished watching the tape and preparing himself, he came out with a brave face. I mean, you see things like this all of the time but never expect it to happen to you. I guess it was inevitable. Again, the air was eerie and it almost felt like it was Compressing so that we could hardly breathe. Expressionless, Emmett reassured me, saying that he will not rest until who ever did this was in jail. No matter how many times I told him who had done this, he wanted more proof and to catch him in the act. I told him numerous times and that he wanted me dead he wouldn't listen.

He began rushing off into his office again but, not before he told me to go home. Seconds later his head peered out of the door and he said "Sorry, I forgot you live in California now…do you want to stop with me until we get everything sorted out." I agreed without delay because I didn't have anything to go back to. Oh no! I had not brought any money, food, or anything. What was I going to do? Emmett had already given me a home for at least a few months but I didn't dare ask incase he lost his temper and he thought that I was abusing his hospitality.

Emmett was a really kind person but has a really short temper. He even goes to anger management classes to help deal with it. Once, when he was just starting off as an officer, he took his anger out on a grieving widower so I thought to myself that it was better to not make a wrong move. Although he has his bad points, he is still a good person and knows exactly how I am. He knows that I grieve in silence. As soon as this thought entered my head he suddenly came back out of his office and chucked the flat keys out of his pocket and told me that he will be home late. I was relieved that he had intended to give me space as I wanted to grieve since I had never really grieved. It felt good to realise that I had a new _home, _a place where I knew the thugs couldn't find me, no matter how hard they tried.

So I took a slow drive back to his flat in an old police car- I suppose it was better than walking. I was shocked that I not only knew where it was so well, but the fact that it looked exactly the same as the last time I had seen it. Some people say that police offices have photographic memories but in actual fact they don't! They just remember little, insignificant things and when it comes to the important things we- I mean they-nearly always forget about them.

The flat was an average sized flat. The living room was a turquoise, felted and patterned wallpaper with an illuminating white sofa. It didn't look like a bachelor pad because of his ex-girlfriend's taste. It felt comforting that the décor was totally different so that I had nothing to remind me of my house in California.

I sat down on the glistening leather white sofa trying to get my head around what I had just saw on the DVD ,and I know that that image would haunt me for the rest of my life. I wish there was some way I could turn back the clock and never have became a cop. But I have to accept that the reality of it is that I can't, and that has to be the end of it

As I lay on the couch I felt a draft so I examined the room. None of the windows were open so I figured out that it was the harsh reality and feeling that my wife had passed away. _Passed away_ -I say it like they had just had a peaceful death but it wasn't. It was murder.

I must have fallen asleep for several hours because Emmett was already back home sitting in the couch opposite to me, looking at me with menacing eyes. What had I done to aggravate him?

"Emmett why are you looking at me like that?" I said very confusedly. I was expecting an instant reply but it was just silence for several minutes. He was deep in thought. Could he have seen something beyond the note and the DVD that I couldn't?

"Emmett come on speak to me!" I croaked, struggling to control my anger and the tension between us.

"Just come down the station and we'll discuss things further" he said very worriedly. I was puzzled.

"Okay, but I am confused" I admitted. I mean I didn't do anything wrong, or had I?

I was very worried by the way he phrased his last sentence. I got the impression that he was questioning me for something other than how I was feeling about my family being murdered. _Murdered-_ I still cannot say that word without sobbing instantly. I decided to go along to the police station even though I was reluctant to, not because I had anything to hide, but the fact that I had just lost my family and I wasn't ready to face answering questions.

I sat in his back seat of his police car. I felt like a criminal. I had done nothing wrong, but then again I didn't do anything to help my family. The pain of that very thought made it impossible to forget. Not only did I do nothing wrong but I sat lying in my bed feeling powerless and watched them being taken away. I guessed that's why he wanted to speak with me. Anyway I left about 3'0clock and time seemed to speed up because a supposed hour long drive took only five minutes.

He took grip of my arm and guided me to the interview room. My footsteps tapped against the concrete floor, almost like how tap dancers would, and sat me down in a metal, uncomfortable chair. Across the matching silver metal table was a pile of papers. Apparently I had been asleep for a few days, or so he had told me, on the couch and not just a few hours. The papers were all about me. They had recognised the room where my precious family were held and said it was the attic. A few of the papers were forensic results. Had Emmett thought that _I _had killed my family?


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3- forensic evidence

Emmett began pressing the button on the tape recorder and he interviewed me.

"So, Edward, for the purpose of the tape, please tell me exactly why you are here." He sighed with no compassion.

"I am here to report my families murder and who exactly did it" I said truthfully, knowing that he was listening carefully incase my story had changed. Why would it change anyway?

He continued "So who exactly did it?" he said angrily, hoping that I would confess.

"I don't know what there names are exactly, but it was the drug customers off that guy I had put away nearly one year ago now." I said hoping that he would begin to realise that I was innocent, I mean I know there are procedures but come on, why would I have killed my family when I was starting fresh?

"For the purpose of the tape I am showing Edward the DVD and letter he had showed me weeks ago… so, why does this handwriting match up with yours?" he shouted, almost as though he had thought he had cracked me.

"I honestly don't know…you do believe me don-" I broke off nearly in tears. He didn't give me the reply I had hoped for.

"Your wife, Bella tried to defend herself by attacking the killer with a pen, and he started to bleed. So tell me, how come it was your blood we found on her shirt if you said you never had seen first hand that she was killed?"

"I honestly don't know…. Could it have been planted there?" I asked confused but I seriously doubted it. I was really shocked that he had even found where my family had died. I was glad I wasn't there to help because I don't think I could of handled it.

"No there is no way of that…anyway so how come there is a cut in your arm? And why did the killer/s not come for you too?" he asked unsympathetically.

"I don't know …. I just don't know." I began to cry. I knew that if I didn't get my composure together then he would charge me there and then. "Maybe the killer/s decided that it would be more painful to let me watch from a distant knowing that I couldn't do anything to stop them?" By this time I was really upset with what he was asking me…it was all a blur and he knows that.

"Interview suspended 3:20pm." He said, glaring at me as he said it.

Just when I thought it was all over, he said to me the dreaded words "I'm arresting you on suspicions of murder" he said pleased, he finally thought I had indeed done it. But how could he? Surely he knew me better than that. He was not the same Emmett that I had known for twenty years; this one was much harder, cold and fiercer.

I was really bothered because I was the only person who knew about the truth about what happened and it was simply not enough. It was my word against theirs but they seemed to only care of my word, as if I was making this up. He sent me straight away to my cell, without letting me fill in my papers. He already knew all of my details so I guessed that I wouldn't be filling them in.

Disorientated, I slowly wandered down the hall. Half of the prisoners inside were who I had put away, so I imagine they are really pleased that I am sent away to this hell hole. I was stripped of my clothes, and my dignity, and I was placed in orange overalls. No-one seemed to listen to me no matter how hard I tried to tell them. I souse that is fair considering when I put some prisoners in jail, I would do the same. My roommate James was a portentous man who was very bonkers and was idolised by his own world. I was pleased that I had never sent him to prison (thank God) because life for me would have been worse.

A few days had passed and I had refused to eat anything. Today I was pleasantly surprised but it soon changed. I found that Emmett was standing there in front of me in my cell, watching my every move. Was there anything else that they wanted to talk to me about….more accusations perhaps? Anyway Emmett was obviously angry at something and it was probably me, but I just ignored that fact. He took me back to the interviewing room. He was colder than what he was before, which was hard to beat. It took several minutes before I asked what was going on.

A reluctant Emmett, spoke with such relief, that it bothered me. "Right, I'm afraid we have to send you across the country to Texas because there are no available spaces here in California for the death penalty prison."

I immediately shouted at the top of my voice "What! How many times do I have to tell you that I am not a murderer! I didn't kill anyone and you know my good reputation as a cop … why would I spoil that? And why are you sending me to the death penalty …you don't have enough evidence to do that" I said in frustration.

"You have to remember that you are no longer a cop, so you have to be treated the same as everyone else, and recently we have found a lot more evidence to pinpoint who exactly did it…you" He misunderstood greatly what I was trying to say.

"No you don't understand, I am innocent and I will make sure everyone knows that." I said automatically without even thinking. How did they get enough evidence…I wasn't even there when they died!

"Well I am afraid that there is nothing we can do for you now." He said sarcastically and I wasn't bothered by it. He had never been one of those people who occasionally spoke sarcastically- he does it all of the time so it's no wonder why I was his only friend. In fact, if he never spoke sarcastically, then I would still expect it since he thinks I am a _good cop bad cop. _My blood was boiling; I had never needed him for anything and I did a lot for him- more than he deserves. I had given him a home when he needed it, looked after his children when he was in hospital for months, supported him through his cancer and that's just off the top of my head. There are hundreds of things I had done for him and he just threw them out of the window. I was disgusted. We didn't bother speaking to each other for several minutes. Even when it was time to go back to my cell, he simply asked a different guard to take me back.

Emmett sent me back to my cell. He was ashamed and disgusted in me and he didn't seem to care about my feelings. On the slow walk down the corridor, the prisoner couldn't help but stare at me; some had puzzled faces, probably wondering what else I had done wrong, but some were fierce and angry at me, but they could not be as angry as Emmett was. I was completely alarmed by what the other prisoners were saying. They must have already heard what I had supposedly done and that I was going to be the next victim of the lethal injection. They all whispered the further I walked down the corridor. I was in an unstable state, I could feel it. The air began to taste bitter at the thought that criminals were talking about me. They could hardly judge, they had probably done far worse that what I was accused for. If it wasn't hard enough fitting in then it would become ten times harder now. Luckily a different guard had said that I would be leaving in a week or two so it I didn't have to put up with them for long.

As soon as I was settled in my cell, the lights turned off and I was in eternal darkness. The darkness was overpowering me and I couldn't stand it. Every second that had passed, I saw different images race through my mind. First there was an elegant butterfly and it soon changed into a roaring dragon. The dragon was a black silhouette but it stood out from the fire surrounding it in the background. Once the fire and the dragon had disappeared, I began to dream of my family. They had whispered my favourite song and it was very appropriate to the situation, almost too appropriate. I know this might sound strange to some people, but my favourite song is _white flag_ by _Dido. _It might not seem strange to you but I always thought that it was meant to be a girly song. This song had very important memories for me as it was my wedding song.

However, they all sang the song but there was the one line which in particular which stuck out from the rest more than anything at the moment. _"I will go down with this ship."_ As soon as I realised that they were all singing the line continuously, I thought long and hard about the message behind it, like it was a sign or something. My thoughts had stopped and I figured that this could mean two things- one: that I was imagining things and my mental state had plummeted, or two; that this was a way of God and my family trying to communicate to me by saying that I will be better in heaven, and that I might go down for someone else's mistake, but I will always have my family by my side in my thoughts and in spirit.


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4-the schoolyard bullies.

Trying to forget about what happened in my dream; I woke up and got dressed, ready for the day ahead. If the dream was a sign, then I would be reunited with my family soon and I am ecstatic just thinking that that was a possibility. I went to the almost deserted breakfast hall, and discovered that someone was already in my seat. I stood my ground by asking him assertively to move along one seat so that he was I could sit at my seat.

The prisoner seemed cheery and kind enough. His nickname was Smithy, which felt kind of odd, especially since he wasn't a blacksmith. I figured that it was probably because of his build- he had very strong, broad shoulders which were twice the size of mine. Everyone was afraid of him but who are they to judge, they were all nearly his size and were twice as mean as he was.

I decided that I would just eat my pork chops incase he didn't want to be disturbed, especially since he kept glancing at me with his half menacing eyes.

"Hi" he said in a quite loud, squeaky, high-pitched voice. If you looked past his enormous build, broad shoulders and tattooed body, he was a nice person. So what was the harm in speaking to him?

"Hi, when did you come here?" I said, sounding rather concerned.

"Just yesterday, have you been here long?"

"No, just a few days now" I said automatically.

"Well, after breakfast would you come with me outside to have a bit fun?" he said very sweetly and innocently.

"Sure" I said without a thought. I knew that it would be good for me to make a new friend, even if it is for a week or two.

After that, we hurriedly ate our food and prepared to go outside. It was sunnier than usual so I was afraid incase I would get sunburned. It must have been my lucky day because there Smithy was, with a tube of factor 15 sunscreen.

We decided that we would go on a walk to get to know each other a bit better. We talked for hours. We walked to a secluded area, where there were very few people, and for some reason he stopped.

"Why did you stop?" I said in a croaky, confused voice.

"Because, I want you to meet my friends; Anthony, David and Bill." He said again, very high pitched.

"Nice to meet you" (I think.) They were slightly smaller than

They stuck their hands out with a friendly gesture which was nice. I thought that having a few friends for the last days here was better than having none. I thought that they were being nice until, I realised that in their other hand were enormous, thick sticks. They were almost like mini tree trunks because they were that thick. I got frightened; there were no guards watching us so I didn't know what to do. They slowly but carefully dragged their branches and circled me, so that I was stuck in the middle.

I panicked; I no I shouldn't have but, I tried to fight my way through the circle and it was impossible. I threw my weight at the circle and they didn't even flinch an inch. By this time, many of the prisoners were crowded around creating a bigger circle. They were all encouraging Smithy and his friends and shouting "kill him." The guards heard the uproar before they managed to hurt me, but they couldn't even get in the circle to stop it.

The guards were furious with them and watched helplessly as Smithy threw the first punch at me. Puzzled and dazzled by the punch, I spun around to try and hit him but the gang pinned me in place. I would be lying if I had said it didn't hurt, but I didn't want to come across as a weakling. Every time they threw a punch at my abdomen, I bit my lip, hoping that it would ease the pain but it didn't. I shouted "help me please….someone; I feel like I'm dying." The guards had commanded them to stop but they refused to. I spat out a puddle of blood and cried. I fell on the floor, weakened, and they kicked me in my ribs.

When the fight finally ended, I vaguely saw the police officers come running towards me. It was their job to make sure the prisoners would behave and no agro (A/N agro means trouble) would happen, but they were failing miserably at it. The officers carried me gently to the prison's infirmary to check me out.

When the nurse examined me, she discovered that I had several broken ribs and a fractured arm. I imagined that she would have sent me to a proper hospital but that was not the case, she said that my injuries were not bad enough to go to hospital, so the officers had placed me gently on the infirmary bed and I fell asleep shortly after that.

When I woke up several officers were surrounding me, probably protecting me incase Smithy and his gang came back. The nurse told me that I was to stay here for a few days so that at least delayed the dreaded execution.

I didn't have much time to think of it since Emmett surprised me with the startling fact that I was to be executed. Just thinking about it makes my skin cringe with horror.

I never really thought about the pain, probably because I was in deep thought, until the nurse came in and asked how my pain was. Within seconds of the nurse asking that, made my ribs seemed burn like I was set on fire.

Every part of my body ached, not just my ribs, and I had cried for a little while. I had cried not because of the pain, but the fact that the fire sensation reminded me of the arson attack and the reality of it all.

How could smithy and his gang do that to me? I thought that we were friends, but now I understand why people are afraid of him. I bet he just thought that it would be good for his playground reputation if he nearly killed a police officer, especially one that had gone off the rails a little bit.


	6. Chapter 5

Chapter 5- the few days in hospital

I tried with all of my remaining strength to not to give up; I wouldn't let the schoolyard bullies win. I know how to deal with bullies, especially since Reneesme was bullied numerous times. She simply ignored them and eventually they went away. The thing is that I only have a few days before I am to fly to Texas and I didn't think I would get the opportunity to. The main goal though is to make sure that they won't pick on anyone else, no matter how big or small they are.

"How are you today Edward…it was very brave for you not to retaliate and attack them back!" the nurse said in a very sweet and sincere voice.

"Well I was just fine until you reminded me of the pain" I said quite viciously. This was not me. I am never mean or sarcastic to anyone; not even my enemies. (Well that is entirely true, I have been nasty to one or two people but I realise now that I shouldn't have.) The nurse gave me a menacing look after I had said that, so I thought I should apologize.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to bite your head off I was just annoyed that my friends had done this…I thought it would have been jimmy who I had put away a few years ago." I said trying to sound genuinely sorry.

"Its okay, you have been through a dramatic time recently…but did you not hear about the nicknames people get in here…they are nicknamed for a reason." The nurse had said, almost whispering, whilst taking the bandages off my ribs and replacing them with new ones.

"There does that feel any better?"

"Yes thank you…it feels more supported and protected. I'm worried incase I knock them and make them worse" I had admitted.

"What was your job before you had come in here?" She spoke with sincerity and compassion. She was genuinely interested.

As I told her my story of how and why I was here, she was genuinely interested. She asked me loads of questions and it was nice.

She didn't seem to badger me like what Emmett had and it was nice. When I asked her why she was asking me this she told me that she wants to become a physiatrist which I told her was fascinating. I had wondered if she was going to work along side the police and she confirmed that with a nod.

She felt like my best friend-which I could talk to her about anything for ages. I told her how worried I was for the execution and how my life seems to go from bad to worse and she just listened. She nodded at the right times so I knew she was interested and listening and not just pretending to be. I was safe in her company and she reassured me a lot.

I couldn't eat anything because it would give me a great deal of pain, besides, I had been beaten up so you are bound to feel upset and don't want to eat or drink. (It is normal right?)


	7. Chapter 6

WENDNESAY…

THURSDAY…

FRIDAY…

Chapter 6- on the plane to Texas

I couldn't sleep last night because I was in thinking about to many things. The nurse said that I was well enough to go on the plane and that disturbed me. I must have only been asleep for one or two days because I had a few hours unaccounted for. I figured that I must have had deep thoughts because I had an aching head. It felt like my head was going to explode especially since I had been thinking a lot recently about my life and my children.

Even in my sleep I had deep thoughts- cool! When I woke up, I just lay there half conscious letting my thoughts take control and go wherever they wanted to go. Several hours later, my thoughts had stopped, and I was left confused with a few unanswered questions. I probably fell asleep again because it was 3am when they brutally woke me up. I didn't hear the cell gate open which amazed me, because it is usually loud, anyway, I think that the brutal awakening had knocked my thoughts out of the window because the unanswered questions quickly disappeared. I hope and pray that I can remember them later, I needed to; my life depended on it literally.

Outside my cell, blocking the doorway, were about 5 or 6 guards, who were dressed in mostly weapons, but they still wore a different kind of a police offer's uniform. They were probably from the maximum security place so that would explain their different uniforms. They were all looking at me with their menacing eyes for several minutes but I just ignored it. I figured that I had a month or two to die, maximum. The longer the time I had before I die, the longer I would have to prove my innocence. At least that was something. The largest guard forced me up on to my feet and put me in shackles and handcuffs. They said I wouldn't get any breakfast this morning because I will get something when I arrive in Texas. That was good really considering I have been off my food for a while.

They got me dressed in cleaner versions of the orange overalls. They were still uncomfortable, but I didn't care. Without delay, they sent me on the plane and I was anxious incase there were any other prisoners on board. Luckily there wasn't, and I could relax a little bit. Before we took off, numerous guards, about 10, boarded the plane and began to gossip about me whilst they checked everything. The gossiping guards reminded me of my mother talking about me and chatting to lots of other mothers. I thought that Emmett probably told them all about me and my so called _good boy, bad boy_ routine. I was used to people talking about me and irritating me now so it didn't bother me as much as I thought; in the beginning it would have hurt a lot more. Whilst they sat down, I had a few minutes to think before they scrutinized me; I thought of how quickly this had happened and how my life had changed drastically because of it.

As soon as I heard the plane begin to start its engine, they got up and sent me right to the back of the plane which was in a metal cage. I felt that this was completely unnecessary but they thought otherwise, it bothered me that they treated me like an animal, because I am not. I may be a lot of things but I am still a person and I still have feelings. At once I sat down on the one chair that was in the metal cage, and they immediately tied my shackles and handcuffs to the hook at the bottom of the chair. I was restrained and I couldn't even move an inch. I had never seen some police officers take this many precautions over one prisoner, but then again, this one prisoner were an ex-police officer. They thought that I was going to try and talk them out of their decision, or at least, to tell them to undo or loosen my shackles. "What am I a _murderer?__"_ I shouted at the top of my voice and it almost made my voice break. Ooh- wrong choice of language, I am classed as a murder now so I must not say daft thing like that again. I figured that if I said anything else after that then they would humiliate and laugh at my every move.

The plane's engine started to roar louder and before I knew it, we were in the air. I was pleased because it meant the quicker I get there the less rubbish I had to put up with because of the guards. There were no windows at my side so I had nothing to stare at for the journey, so I just looked at my feet and started thinking. I wouldn't be surprised if the guards would have thought that I was imagining of a possible way that I could escape by looking at my feet, where the whole restrain mechanism was. Because of this, I looked away at one of the planes walls. I thought again of my family and how I wouldn't get the justice in which they so rightfully deserve.

Out of the corner of my eye I could see that the guards were watching me so I plucked up the courage to ask them why I was going to get the death row. I mean, the accusations were not enough to be executed, or so I thought. Apparently I had committed first degree murder with special circumstances. When I asked them what the special circumstances, were they simply ignored me. I felt like a school child being told off by the teacher for something I didn't do, but the reality of it was that it is much worse.

I managed to get a few hours sleep. During that sleep I dreamt of that horrible night but it was a bit different, it was through the eyes of the thug and I wasn't in my bed trying to sleep. I had seen how they died, but it was as though I was there killing them firsthand and not watching it off the DVD. I woke up at the nightmare and I froze with horror. Did I really kill my family? - No I couldn't have- I loved them too much. Were there any thugs in the first place? There were so many unanswered questions in my mind and I didn't want to think about them anymore.

The one thing I did think about after the thoughts was to try to think really hard about what exactly happened that night. Every time I tried to remember it always came back the same- that I had killed them. I didn't want to accept the fact that I had, but I figured there was no other choice; I had to. The memories of that night came flooding back and I had a falling out with Bella and Reneesme- that's why I went to _McDonalds _- to try and make it up to them because subconsciously I thought that they would be hungry, and that I had done wrong. They never seemed to warm to New Jersey so that's probably what the argument was about. The thing was though I had warmed to New Jersey and I loved it there even if it was just a few hours in the state, it had made me angry, furious in fact so that's the reason why I killed them. I didn't mean to hurt them- I had never lost my temper with them before even if I was in the right- but I did. How could I have done such a thing?

I began to weep with regret. I hoped now that the execution was going to be sooner rather than later, it was not as though I had anything to live for. The plane had finally landed and I was still thinking. Even though I was aware that it had landed, I wanted to sit here and think a bit more about that night.

The guards all unlocked me and I was handed over to some other guards. These guards were much scarier and bulkier. They didn't need to carry a weapon because they were a weapon in themselves. Outside, the sky was a bright aqua blue and the sun shone in my eyes, almost blinding me. We were not in an airport- we were in a special landing facility next to the maximum security jail. My eyes started to burn and I became dizzy. When I took one step outside the plane, I stumbled and I still saw what very little there was. All of the guards were looking frightened by my presence and grubby appearance. One of the guards physically dragged me inside to the cell.

I was petrified; and I thought the prison I was in was bad- this one was my worst nightmare. As I approached the cell, I noticed that it was even more cramped than my other cell. Luckily I had no-one else to share my cell with so at least that was a positive thing about the whole situation.


	8. Chapter 7

Chapter 7- the slovenly cell

The biggest guard loosened my shackles and pushed me forcefully into my cell. As I inspected the cell, I realised I was sick. The slovenly hospital-like cell confirmed that. Inside the hospital cell, there were a few illuminating lights which were masked with numerous layers of dust, somehow they still managed to blind and dazzle me. There were also small, perfectly aligned white tiles with many delicate chips, which seemed to produce numerous more with every step that I took. 323 there were- I spent all day today counting them, because I knew that if I wasn't kept preoccupied, then I would think of my family again, and the repercussions of my crime.

The bed was nothing like a hospitals' bed; I normally dislike hospital beds—who wouldn't— but after spending days in the California cell it would seem like heaven on a plate. My bed was a hard, damp and a disgustingly smelly shelf with a thin layer of padding. It was even worse than the California bed which was hard to beat.

Night-time came by hastily, defiantly because I had a long day. I had another nightmare; I had the same _white flag_ dream as what I had in the other prison. I kept thinking that if there was some way I could turn back the clocks then I would have. I didn't even understand why I did it in the first place. On the rare occasion that Bella and I did have a disagreement, I used to just go off somewhere and come back later when I had clamed down. I hadn't really thought how Emmett had handled the news; because Bella and he were great friends; just as much as I and Emmett used to be. Every night I wonder what Emmett was doing; what case he was solving, but I didn't much tonight because he had abandoned me. Best friends don't abandon their friends. All night I felt sorry for myself. I felt like I was a little lost puppy; completely unaware of its surroundings and what is worse is the fact that I had murdered my family and I had no excuse for feeling sorry for myself.

The time which was usually kept for Emmett had been spent thinking about how drastically my life had changed. It had not been even a month since I was in here but it felt like years. Another thing I thought about more than anything was the fact that in a few weeks I would be dead. For the rest of the night I spent in the darkest corner of the cell, partly as a result of the blinding light but partly because I wanted to look at the last thing I had left of my family and the only possession I had at all- a small, passport sized photograph of all of my family at the party we attended a year ago. I started to worry and think deeply about my family. I thought that no-one would see my gorgeous daughters grow u, get boyfriends or see them get married and go to prom. Most of these events are taken for granted by some fathers but they should count themselves lucky- that at least they would see them have a happy life. Some fathers take these events for granted and see them as insignificant but I don't. I never even got to see half of these events and now, neither did my wife.

Putting my selfishness aside, I started to talk to a 3inch cockroach, he seemed to know me well and although I only knew him/her 2 minutes, I felt as though he knew me more than anyone else.

"Hello, what is your name?" I said very sweetly. I must have lost my mind and. finally realising, this I shut up. Trying to regain my sanity, I lay on my bed looking at the ceiling tiles. These ceiling tiles were nothing like the tiles off the floor- they were cream and had a marble effect. Huh that was odd, I thought that you could only get marble effect tiles for the floor and not the ceiling.

I was seriously worried that I would end up on my death bed through a stabbing and not a lethal injection. I began to think deeply again, to hopefully try and distract myself from the tiles. I thought mostly about how I had nothing to live for because they were dead. I took a big sigh and looked up to God. "Why?" I began to howl repeatedly, as though this was not my fault. The reality of it was that I am sick and don't think about the consequences of my actions.

I don't know why I do it, but I always think on the negative side of life and always feel sorry for myself. I mean, we are all allowed to feel sorry for ourselves once and a while, but I had committed a serious crime which deserved no sympathy. I also saw lightning quick flashes of that night again.

How long was it going to be before I forget about that night? I bet even when I'm in heaven I will se the night over and over again in my mind, but as clear as crystal. That was a really stupid thing to say, I mean after my actions I will most defiantly go to hell. Realising this, I began to wonder if I would see any of my family again in heaven, especially since I would be in hell.

The rest of that night passed quicker than usual and by morning I was ready for my breakfast. Although it was slop, I enjoyed more than I expected. I usually am very picky with my food, but in prison you don't get a choice. As usual I sat down by myself with no-one to talk to. I would have preferred to just have one person there to ensure my sanity is kept to the maximum that it can be but I found it wasn't a necessary. Every part of the day after that was a blur.


	9. Chapter 8

Chapter 8 – the dreaded day

By the time I realised that it was near the end of the day, I was sent back to my cell. Before I was in my cell, they had told me that I was going to be executed tomorrow. With this in mind, it made my sanity worse. I had to try and carry on as normal so that I could forget what he had told me. As any usual night I lay there with my thoughts pondering about many different things; other than tomorrow. I was expecting at least a few weeks and not a few days, but when I had asked the guard what the reason for it being so soon was; he simply said that the paperwork had arrived earlier than expected.

Currently succeeding in forgetting about tomorrow, I lay in the shelf—like bed, glaring out of the minute cell window. Then I began to remember. The rain was surprisingly heavy and surreal, but at the same time it seemed to know what was coming tomorrow and how exactly I was feeling.

Later that night, about midnight, I had finally fallen asleep. I could feel my mind drifting in and out of consciousness. I had dreamt of my family, but mostly Reneesme. She drew a picture of all of us holding hands. It was a nice thing to see because it felt so real and she loved to draw. I even thought that she could become an artist when she would grow up. But, of coarse I would never see that and neither would anyone else for that matter. As I examined the picture further, paying close attention to the detail and the likeness of each of us, I noticed that I was standing in the middle of it. Dead. I had felt really furious that she had drawn me like that, but also I knew that she was sick too. Was everything that I had touched mentally ill because of me?

For the rest of that night I dreamt constantly of my family becoming sicker and sicker. I didn't know what to do; there was nothing I could do about it and it made me more upset than I had ever been. At that moment distant voices spoke softly in my ear. At first I though that it was my family, telling me that we will see each other soon, but I soon realised that it wasn't them speaking-It was the guards.

At that moment I woke up with an alarmingly cold sweat. A menacing sound echoed in my throbbing ear and it was the security guard, along with Emmett shouting ferociously for me to get up. I wasn't happy at the thought that I would die today, but I was glad that Emmett would be here to see me. Oh- he was probably only here to see me die to make him feel better.

My whole body suddenly became paralysed as I reminded myself that I would die this afternoon. I stupidly and naively thought that I would have died tonight but in actual fact it was this morning, just after breakfast. As I slowly regained movement I began to get up and walk so ungraciously that it looked like I had been drinking.

One of the guards next to Emmett, who is usually an abrupt man was pleasantly pleased today. He even smiled at me today which was a first and a one time thing for him. The guard is a grotesque man with tight fitting and shabby clothes. He is an angrier man than Emmett, which frightened me. He gave me the impression that he wouldn't miss me at all, which was hardly a shock.

Breakfast came by very speedy this morning but I couldn't eat anything. I got to chose and even though I am not English I still like English food so I chose a full England breakfast incase there was a minute chance of me eating it. I never ate it because how can you eat when in a few hours or less you would be dying.

After breakfast, the time passed slowly. Every millisecond that had passed seemed like an hour had passed. In fact, everything around me had slowed down and I quickly realised that my time was up. The same menacing guard appeared gradually down the grim lunch hall walking immensely slow. At that moment, hundreds of faces sluggishly turned to mine and laughed. How could a human want some else to die? It's insane!

At he and Emmett directed me to the execution room, I asked Emmett if he could come in with me. " Emmett we were friends, would you please come I with me?" I knew that there was a small percentage of a chance that he would come with me, but I figured it was worth a try.

" Let me just correct you before I give you my answer." He said sympathetically. Then he continued " we are still friends it was just your head telling you otherwise… and yes I will go in with you, I was planning on going in with you anyway" he broke off about to sob.

" Thank you, you are a really good friend to me despite everything that had happened. I now realise that you were just doing your job and I couldn't stop you. It would be wrong for me even if I tried because it could have got you in trouble for something I did do." I said trying to compose my final thoughts.

" Edward, I'm afraid it is time for you to go to the room." Emmett said carefully, trying not to upset the both of us.

" Yeah I know. Before I forget, thank you for being a great friend to me, I will always love you because you know that you are like a brother to me." I said, trying my best not to weep.

Emmett must have felt that he had to say something because tears flowed down his face. He then began to say " you are my brother too, I have never judged you for what you had done and if I had it my way, then you would be living with me and attending counselling and not going to die."

Emmett sat next to me gripping my hand. There was a few people there, sitting in hard plastic seats trying to be prepared. As I stared at everyone's blank expressions, I began to feel like I was in a waiting room, waiting to go to see the doctor. One by one they were asked to come up and every few minutes I moved up a seat. My paralysis had returned again and I couldn't even speak. At that very instant, a woman came out of the room and told me that it was my turn. Emmett helped me get on my feet and took me to the room.

In fact, the room broke off into several further rooms. I had imagined that one of the rooms was where they heartlessly piled the bodies up in a heap. Two more where the stack of paperwork and the used needles. The final room, which was located in the middle, was for the executions. When I told bobby what I thought the rooms were for, he just laughed and said that they were relatives and coffins, which made me feel so much better.

Emmett couldn't bear to restrain me in the dentist-like chair, so he turned away whilst a different guard did it. When he sat down next to me holding my hand tightly, I reassured him saying that everything was going to be alright. He was supposedly there to reassure me and not the other way around. I immediately shut up when the person showed me the needle and started talking. "You look really scared….don't worry it won't hurt at all. If you just look away now at your friend … what's his name?"

"His name is Emmett, and are you going to inject me now…is that why you want me to look at him?"

Then she took a deep sign "no I thought that it might help if you looked at him for one last time."

"Okay" is said calmingly, when I looked at Emmett, I felt a sharp prick and began to feel dizzy and sick. Emmett began sobbing and that's all I remember off the execution.


	10. Chapter 9

Chapter 9-reuunited 

Shortly after the sharp prick, I felt as though I had an outer-body experience because I saw my body there, and Emmett still sobbing. When I rose up towards the sky, I stopped halfway to look at the scenery. It was beautiful. Although I only saw a quick glance, it was magical. Then I shot up to the clouds. A bright light surrounded and blinded me, then it mysteriously vanished into some solid gold gates. The gates were 100foot high, minimum. They were dazzling. A man appeared in a beard and white robes, it looked like god. (Well, it looked like how I would imagine God) he told me that if I accepted my actions and are truly sorry, then I may enter. Waiting eagerly at the other side of the gate was my family. They were smiling at me and it was the most magical sight that I had ever seen.

"Dad, come here, we have missed you. You will love this place, all you have to do if you want something is to think of it and it will appear right in front of you!" Reneesme had said enthusiastically.

I thought about that night for one last time; this time more deeply than I ever had before. Because of this, it gave me much more pain than I thought was imaginable.

"You may pass young one, for you have dealt with a few things…go and being reunited with your family." God had said in a peaceful and grateful voice.

" All I ask is that you never do anything like this again…promise?"

"Sure, I feel much happier now so there is no need for me to do anything like that again. God thank you for not sending me to hell." I said truthfully.

"Ha, there is no such thing as heaven and hell, just heaven. That is just a myth that some people who had near death experiences started!

"Oh. Well thank you anyway" I said with a burst of relief for some peculiar reason.

A distant voice shouted "my son, I am so sorry for what I had said, and keeping me dying a secret from you. I am the reason you went crazy." My mother shouted with some regret.

"No you are not, I was the one who went off the rails, and anyway can we please forget about this and move on…we have our whole lives ahead." I said honestly.

We all started laughing at the ironic statement I had said.

Somehow I wondered what exactly I had left behind. Emmett. How was he going to cope without his only friend? He probably thought that I was not a good friend to him and that I treat him horribly but I knew I hadn't.


	11. Chapter 10

Emmett's POV

I was shocked and unprepared for his death. I had always thought about what he had done and not how he was feeling. He was obviously sorrier than what words can say, but I just sat there and watched him dye innocently in spirit.

Whatever controlled him made him obviously different, but in many ways. He told me in the waiting room that I would be thinking horrible thoughts about him but the truth is I wasn't. Whatever made him this way took control, and made him think the worst possible in people. I was his best friend and nothing was going to change that; not now not ever.

He also said that he had no-one in the world left and that I had betrayed him. The thing is he was my friend and he was all _I_ had left. He felt like my brother and nothing in the world can change that; _he was my brother_.

Edwards' death had a huge impact on me. I should have helped him; he was clearly sick. Many thoughts were pondering in my mind about why he could have ruined five lives for nothing- it was pointless and nothing like him.

The doctor told me that I had to move for the next person, but I couldn't.

"So what will happen to his body?" I whispered, hoping that there was some way that he was still alive. No such luck though.

"It will go into a coffin and be buried. Some relatives have a funeral for him but if you were to do that, it would be buried in a few days." The nurse said almost without thinking, she had to say this hundreds of times a day.

"So you are telling me that some people have a funeral for prisoners?" I asked with a puzzled but assertive voice.

"Yes most defiantly, they are still people; you know they still have relatives and people who care about them. They deserve to be treated like everyone else that way." She said with a harsh and angry tone as though I was mocking them. She continued "Does he have any relatives that you are aware of?" she must have not known what he had done. Although he had killed his family, he was a decent man who deserved to have a proper send off. Trying to answer the question, I croaked out "no, all of his family had passed away, so it is just me and a few of his friends." It was very difficult to say that he killed them so I gave him some respect that way.

The nurse tried her best to assist me out of the room where Nicholas lay, but I didn't want to leave him. I have had a lot of people die around me, but I thought that we would at least grow old together and not like this.

"Come on you have to leave…I have to make some preparations" she said, trying to be sincere but failing miserably. I still was adamant to stay here, no matter what she says or does. I wouldn't leave my best friend… he was my life and if he was dead then I am dead inside.

"Guards please take him out of here, gently though, he has just lost someone close to him" she shouted with very little compassion and sincerity.

I got up immediately as she said this and I knew that I had to leave. At the very least I had to make the preparations myself for his funeral. "It's okay. I'm leaving now, just wanted to say a last goodbye to him. Sorry for any trouble I had caused." I said almost weeping.

I left the execution room which Edward was in, and looked at him for one last time. With every breath and step I took, everything surrounding me echoed. I got a sharp, numbing pain that passed through me body as soon as the nurse shut the door behind me.

Another nurse, who was sorting some paperwork out smiled at me with a menacing and cunning smile. As I approached her she saw my shadow and immediately said in a furious voice "what do you want sir?"

"It doesn't matter… you are obviously busy ill ask someone else." I said automatically in reply to her rude, aggressive tone.

"No…no I'm sorry I didn't mean to speak to you like that. It's just I have had a bad day."

I was startled by her apology so I told her "I can relate to that. You see my best friend was executed today because of me. If I gave him a chance and thought that he was ill, then he would still be alive today and I would have my best friend back."

"I'm so sorry for you loss…so what did you want to say to me before?" she had said, with a false smile on her face.

" I was just wondering if you could tell me if it is possible to fly a body to another state. Is it?" I calmly said, but still hoping and waiting if that was possible.

It seemed like ages before she had answered, but the answer was what I was hoping and longed for. (That it is possible.)

I was so relieved, that I practically knelt down at her feet and thanked her. Now, me and all of the rest of the work force could have a proper send off to him, but not until I prove his innocence first. I wanted him although he is dead, to be cleared and to be an innocent man.

Deep down I know he did it, but because he was ill, that should have changed everything.


End file.
